The Loser’s Game


I don’t know if I’m mad at myself or just mad…. at myself. Feeling really pathetic right now, dunno why. Ask mister over here in my head, maybe he knows. But I surely doubt he’ll tell.

(Do you guys realize that ‘he’ll’ spells ‘h-e-l-l’? As in ‘hell’? Pretty obvious, dumbass! Haha…)

Right now I’m in self-loath mode. The hell, I hate this mode! I mean, what good comes out from hating yourself, other than suicide…. and self-inflicting wounds…. and a broken heart. And what I really hate is that I can’t figure out what triggers this emotional landslide. Was it the music I’m listening to? Was it the effing mak cik beside me in the bus who goes on talking bullshit, on and on and on? Or was it the sight of a couple I saw in the sunset? Wait, the last one doesn’t count….

(andohbytheway, don’t ask what ‘effing’ means. That’s soooo lame dude. Anyways, who the hell asked? Seriously, major head problem here, don’t mind my language, ‘kay?)

I bluff. Actually, we humans are retards most of the time. Actually times two, I’m a retard. I do know what’s causing this heavy emo downpour but hey, I HATE to admit it. Why?

Simple. ‘Cause the reason is damn straightforward, damn simple, and damn nonsense. That is why I don’t wanna admit it. Pretty lame, huh!? But if you do realize, which I doubt you don’t, we humans are always like that. What do you call this? Craving for recognition? Maybe. Tsundere? Double maybe. Call it whatever you want, the root of this problem is, guess what, the fundamental humane urge to be cared by others, duh! So, I guess I’m pretty lacking love right now, right? Pretty pathetic times two!

‘Kay, no more bullshit. I’m outta here. Goodnight fags!

…end of Chit-Chat #6…


The Loser’s Game

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